[ Said with a straight face, but then Hythlodaeus can't resist and cracks up with a small laugh. ]
Or more like watching people's reactions to me doing that is absolutely delightful.
[ He casts a curious glance at Hades at the last part, though. It didn't seem like he said it in a pained way, but at the same time, he can't help walking a little closer, in fact his friend truly does need support of some sort. ]
[ Of course his friend would be just this level of ridiculous; of course he would be a terror even after all this time. Emet-Selch, who has always been somewhat more sour than sweet in nature to put it lightly, has always been softened around the edges by the company of his fellows.
Many in Amaurot had mentioned it, in their time.
Shaking his head, he motions at his body. ]
Oh, measured and whole and not falling to pieces at the seams. Am I supposed to be capable of imagining what returning to the star might entail? That is beyond even me.
[ And Hythlodaeus just chuckles more at Emet-Selch's denial, but also walks close and doesn't let his attention stray much, despite all the wealth of everything around them. At this... he hums. What he says he is certain his friend knows, but still. ]
Well, we are, very slowly, fading. I am guessing we're having a bit of a time before we move on to what is next for us. But it is very slow, so it shouldn't be trouble for quite a while.
[ Beat. Then, deadpan. ]
Or was Emet-Selch, Keeper of the Underworld, pulling my leg just now?
[ He rather thinks even Hades has a thing or two to learn about what is happening, but teasing him has ever been a part of how Hythlodaeus is. ]
Oh, certainly. I would enjoy nothing more than some brief relief and succour. A shame our little Hero is not here to grant us some extra relief of duty.
[ Yes, they are together, and yes, it is wonderful to be with the real Hythlodaeus rather than a shade, but he is nothing short of a sour man at heart.
Our Hero will join us... When the time for it comes. And oh, no, whatever will you do. When the person so well suited to answering the calls for help of others is the one crying out this time.
[ Small smile, with a tiny hue of hope to it. ]
Perhaps, for once, I might be the one to come to your rescue...
[ Hythlodaeus theatrically presses a hand towards his chest, but the way he shakes his head is not even resigned - he is content with being here the way that he is, for Emet-Selch. For those who need to blaze the trail - or, in this case... rest. ]
Well then. My aid is always yours, unneeded though it may be. And yes, we will be together again, one day. I am certain - and I know you might not be very thrilled by that, but... howsoever long it may take.
[ Emet-Selch's eyes follow Hythlodaeus' hand without realising it, feeling overwhelmed and uncertain before he breathes out and forces himself to look elsewhere. It still hurts, a deep ache inside of him, all the things he had done and all the people he had lost and forgotten.
It hurts. ]
Another life. Do you truly believe I have earned such a thing?
[ The mirth, the showmanship, disappear from his face in an instant, and Hythlodaeus reaches his hands to cup Emet-Selch's face gently, looking into his eyes with all that he has.
The pain, its deep roots attempting to tarnish his very soul, but that soul was ever so, so bright... even ages and ages of hurting, both himself and others, has not darkened it. ]
Hades...
[ Hythlodaeus takes in a deep breath, trying to seek out words that fit what he feels, what he thinks. ]
I do believe, my dear, dear friend. If it is not happening immediately, it is not because you fail to deserve it, or anything else good, but only because you have earned a rest.
For whatever you have done, it cannot have been only ill, or only wrong. I know you. [ Through and through. ] And that is why I believe.
[ It is an intensely tender moment and there are few people in the world he would allow it from.
Hythlodaeus, as he often does, tops that list, without any hesitation. His dearest friend, image remade in agony and hurt, come to life in front of him.
It is beautiful and heartbreaking the more he endures it. ]
A rest? I highly doubt many would dare suggest that I had earned any measure of break or relaxation with all that I have done.
[ He shifts, leaning a little closer, smothering his own feelings. ]
You believe in second chances. You are among the few.
[ The way those parts of him get pushed down makes Hythlodaeus's brow scrunch in, but he only shifts closer to Emet-Selch, rather than trying to stop him. There is time. There will be a lot of time, he knows. He will make time, if he has to. ]
I believe you did your best by the star, as much as you knew how. I believe this with all of myself, and so, yes, second chances will be real, and yours will be well-earned.
But rest... it is needed, before you have to face more trials. And another chance will test you again. Test each of us, and I am not sure if witnessing our tests would not be harder on you than your own. And you have spent your strength, given it out to the world, over and over again. Let me lend you mine, until yours recovers, hmm?
I did all that was within my power to do. It was not enough, I know that now, but at least it was something.
[ He notes Hythlodaeus creeping closer and sighs, reaching out to offer his hand - for himself and his friend both, to anchor them together. ]
How will you give me your strength? You know as well as I do that there is nothing in me that will take your words. I want peace and quiet, at least for a little while.
[ Softly, and he squeezes the offered hand - gently. ]
You must know me enough to be aware that peace and quiet are not completely out of the question. And, so long as you're near, I'll be content with that, myself. So let us find a comfortable place for it, hmm?
[ Hythlodaeus much wants to ask, does Hades truly believe he is undeserving of second chances, but this is not the time. Perhaps, in a century or so. Not now.
Instead, he finds them a sweetly-colored cranny where they can curl up and just... be. ]
You spoke true, you know. Let us be comforted. Because I am, with you near, too.
[ There is so much time ahead of them and he knows that, recognises it for what it is - he feels suddenly overwhelmed at the notion of a future, something he has not considered for a very, very long time.
He wants to rest. Perhaps he has not truly earned that, but he wants it all the same, his shoulders sagging just so. ]
Are you? [ Reaching out, he touches Hythlodaeus' face. ] I made a falsehood of you and denied it memories of the truth. How could you stand at my side?
[ Hythlodaeus half-closes his eyes, leans into the touch without hesitation, like he is starved for it (he is). Then he blinks, with a little more focus even as he moves his body, to hold and mold itself around Emet-Selch's, protective. ]
Not... not falsehood, unless painting someone's likeness would be a falsehood.
I remember, back then, you talked about it being disrespect, when you were told you would do that. But... so much was lost. To you, to all of us. So you made a stand-in, to exist in some way until we would return. Magick on such a scale would be beyond anyone but you, and I am glad to learn that I was there. You... you said that you would not dismiss me completely from your side, and you did not.
[ It was painful, agonising, to hear echoed words surround him and not be able to see his friend, hale and whole and content to be there. It had felt like a betrayal, despite the necessity of it, and swallowing back his pain is something that is difficult to do.
Lifting his head to the sky, he forces himself to breathe. ]
None of you will return the way that you were meant.
[ There is a nigh eternity in the lifestream for Hades to shrug off his pain and grow, but he does not want to think of it. He does not want to imagine the changes that will come with his own self-forgiveness.
He has oft struggled with joy, for all the pretence he carries. ]
[ Despite the worry for Emet-Selch, Hythlodaeus smiles, gently, and a little brighter than before. ]
That's me, as always. But before hope, there is rest.
My likeness, soulless or no. You ever knew me far too well to get me wrong. It was not me, and that must have been excruciating for you, but it was also a part of me. And had I remembered... I would have given you permission.
[ He would have, too. Because he knows that he is needed, however weak and useless he may be, and such a long time... alone. He does not wish that to his friend. ]
[ Hythlodaeus lets out a sharp breath, then moves, to embrace Hades and hold on, reading the body language and finally giving in to just. How he wants to be, twined with him as close as he can be. ]
No longer. It is over, Hades, the nightmare is finally over.
I'm here.
[ He can see so much... so much pain. A yawning abyss in Hades's eons of existence which, Hythlodaeus is sure, will keep sucking him back in for a while yet. His friend, whose tongue is sharp but heart is soft, has suffered, and he can only give this. Reassurance, calm, and time. ]
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[ Said with a straight face, but then Hythlodaeus can't resist and cracks up with a small laugh. ]
Or more like watching people's reactions to me doing that is absolutely delightful.
[ He casts a curious glance at Hades at the last part, though. It didn't seem like he said it in a pained way, but at the same time, he can't help walking a little closer, in fact his friend truly does need support of some sort. ]
Functional?
[ Soft and sweet. ]
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[ Of course his friend would be just this level of ridiculous; of course he would be a terror even after all this time. Emet-Selch, who has always been somewhat more sour than sweet in nature to put it lightly, has always been softened around the edges by the company of his fellows.
Many in Amaurot had mentioned it, in their time.
Shaking his head, he motions at his body. ]
Oh, measured and whole and not falling to pieces at the seams. Am I supposed to be capable of imagining what returning to the star might entail? That is beyond even me.
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Well, we are, very slowly, fading. I am guessing we're having a bit of a time before we move on to what is next for us. But it is very slow, so it shouldn't be trouble for quite a while.
[ Beat. Then, deadpan. ]
Or was Emet-Selch, Keeper of the Underworld, pulling my leg just now?
[ He rather thinks even Hades has a thing or two to learn about what is happening, but teasing him has ever been a part of how Hythlodaeus is. ]
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Oh, how wonderful, a prolonged experience is just what we could have asked for. The Star is truly dissatisfied with us.
[ He looks over, smirking a little. ]
I've no spirit for jest. You know that.
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[ Together, he doesn't say. But he is pretty sure Hades understands it. He hopes he does.
Beat. ]
And I know no such thing. Your jests are much to my liking, always.
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[ Yes, they are together, and yes, it is wonderful to be with the real Hythlodaeus rather than a shade, but he is nothing short of a sour man at heart.
That is not going to change. ]
A cry for help if I were to ever hear one.
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[ Small smile, with a tiny hue of hope to it. ]
Perhaps, for once, I might be the one to come to your rescue...
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[ It's rare that Emet-Selch is hopeful, but he has been particularly coloured of late. ]
That will never be the case, I am certain. Do try not to become too optimistic.
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Well then. My aid is always yours, unneeded though it may be. And yes, we will be together again, one day. I am certain - and I know you might not be very thrilled by that, but... howsoever long it may take.
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It hurts. ]
Another life. Do you truly believe I have earned such a thing?
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The pain, its deep roots attempting to tarnish his very soul, but that soul was ever so, so bright... even ages and ages of hurting, both himself and others, has not darkened it. ]
Hades...
[ Hythlodaeus takes in a deep breath, trying to seek out words that fit what he feels, what he thinks. ]
I do believe, my dear, dear friend. If it is not happening immediately, it is not because you fail to deserve it, or anything else good, but only because you have earned a rest.
For whatever you have done, it cannot have been only ill, or only wrong. I know you. [ Through and through. ] And that is why I believe.
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Hythlodaeus, as he often does, tops that list, without any hesitation. His dearest friend, image remade in agony and hurt, come to life in front of him.
It is beautiful and heartbreaking the more he endures it. ]
A rest? I highly doubt many would dare suggest that I had earned any measure of break or relaxation with all that I have done.
[ He shifts, leaning a little closer, smothering his own feelings. ]
You believe in second chances. You are among the few.
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I believe you did your best by the star, as much as you knew how. I believe this with all of myself, and so, yes, second chances will be real, and yours will be well-earned.
But rest... it is needed, before you have to face more trials. And another chance will test you again. Test each of us, and I am not sure if witnessing our tests would not be harder on you than your own. And you have spent your strength, given it out to the world, over and over again. Let me lend you mine, until yours recovers, hmm?
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[ He notes Hythlodaeus creeping closer and sighs, reaching out to offer his hand - for himself and his friend both, to anchor them together. ]
How will you give me your strength? You know as well as I do that there is nothing in me that will take your words. I want peace and quiet, at least for a little while.
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[ Softly, and he squeezes the offered hand - gently. ]
You must know me enough to be aware that peace and quiet are not completely out of the question. And, so long as you're near, I'll be content with that, myself. So let us find a comfortable place for it, hmm?
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I know you can muster yourself, manage yourself well enough. I trust you in that.
[ He takes a step forward, almost nervous about it. ]
Let us go and be comforted, then.
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Instead, he finds them a sweetly-colored cranny where they can curl up and just... be. ]
You spoke true, you know. Let us be comforted. Because I am, with you near, too.
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He wants to rest. Perhaps he has not truly earned that, but he wants it all the same, his shoulders sagging just so. ]
Are you? [ Reaching out, he touches Hythlodaeus' face. ] I made a falsehood of you and denied it memories of the truth. How could you stand at my side?
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Not... not falsehood, unless painting someone's likeness would be a falsehood.
I remember, back then, you talked about it being disrespect, when you were told you would do that. But... so much was lost. To you, to all of us. So you made a stand-in, to exist in some way until we would return. Magick on such a scale would be beyond anyone but you, and I am glad to learn that I was there. You... you said that you would not dismiss me completely from your side, and you did not.
And what memories did you deny, hmm?
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[ It was painful, agonising, to hear echoed words surround him and not be able to see his friend, hale and whole and content to be there. It had felt like a betrayal, despite the necessity of it, and swallowing back his pain is something that is difficult to do.
Lifting his head to the sky, he forces himself to breathe. ]
None of you will return the way that you were meant.
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There are some things that need to be let out in full, especially after they have festered... ]
It has been so long. Perhaps it will be better to start anew. With hearts filled with hope.
[ How long has it been since his Hades had felt hope, Hythlodaeus wonders. ]
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He has oft struggled with joy, for all the pretence he carries. ]
Hearts filled with hope. Sentimental fool.
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That's me, as always. But before hope, there is rest.
My likeness, soulless or no. You ever knew me far too well to get me wrong. It was not me, and that must have been excruciating for you, but it was also a part of me. And had I remembered... I would have given you permission.
[ He would have, too. Because he knows that he is needed, however weak and useless he may be, and such a long time... alone. He does not wish that to his friend. ]
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Of course you would have. I doubt there is much I might have done that would truly have offended you.
[ He shifts a little closer, longing for the contact, the comfort, without having the ability to say the words aloud. ]
It was enough but not. I could see you, walk with you, near enough, but not know you. It was a waking nightmare.
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No longer. It is over, Hades, the nightmare is finally over.
I'm here.
[ He can see so much... so much pain. A yawning abyss in Hades's eons of existence which, Hythlodaeus is sure, will keep sucking him back in for a while yet. His friend, whose tongue is sharp but heart is soft, has suffered, and he can only give this. Reassurance, calm, and time. ]
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